Contemplations in the Afterlife 06
Fandom: Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters
Genre: Romance, Angst
Description: Despite his love for Seto Kaiba, the Pharaoh Yami Yugi has decided to move on to the afterlife. Now, he feels regret for his decision, and prays for another chance for him and his beloved to be together.
Pairing: Seto Kaiba x Yami Yugi (Prideshipping)
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh!
Contemplations in the Afterlife
by: scarlet wax petal
Click here to return to Chapter 5. Click here to see the Table of Contents.
Chapter 6: Torment
A long, long time ago, I awoke with my mind a virtual blank. I had no memories, knew nothing -- not even a language, not even an inkling of who I was or what I was. I felt like I had just been born -- only that, unlike a newborn child, I had the capacity to easily receive and keep memories and sensations; that, I was sure of. Thus, my memories began at that moment when I first opened my eyes and became aware of my consciousness.
But... where was I?
All I could see... was nothing. And it was cold, and piercingly silent. Occasionally, I would hear what I later found out to be drops of water, or the whispers of the wind, or the booming drumming thunder. I was always glad whenever I heard those sounds; that was how I became certain that I could hear. Furthermore, they broke the tedious silence, and gave me something to look forward to.
Other than that, there was nothing. Nothing to see, nothing to do.
I would then fall into unconsciousness. For how long, I didn't know. And then I would awaken, to the same nothingness. To the same cold. And then fall into unconsciousness once again. It always felt pleasant whenever I fell into unconsciousness because, then, I wouldn't be feeling anything. It was wonderful not to feel anything.
I hated the boredom. I hated not having anything to do.
I hated it whenever I woke up. Whenever I realized I had awakened, I would try my best to slip into the wonderful oblivion again. To no avail. I would have to wait for it to arrive, and it always took so long. Months? Years? Decades? I didn't know. I never wanted to know. It was tormenting. The silence was tearing me apart. The darkness was driving me to the brink of losing control. The cold was piercing through the center of my existence. I wished that I would just lose control. Or, better yet, cease to exist. But it never happened.
Finally, I decided I was tired of not having anything to do. Somehow, I knew I had to do something! I began to explore the capabilities of my consciousness. Somehow, I learned that I had to capacity to move. Why had it taken me so long to learn this? But I didn't mind; I was overjoyed to learn that I had that ability. Now I had something to do!
Bit by bit, I moved around. At first, it was exhausting, dragging myself through what I later learned to be the floor. But I was glad to feel the sensation of being exhausted. It was a new feeling. Most of all, I was glad to find myself moving. Then, I began to ease myself upward, away from the floor. I made use of what I later found out to be legs. At first, I fell back to the floor. But I was determined. I would ease myself upward, then fall, then ease myself upward again. Until I learned to stand on my own. And, later on, walk on my own.
I walked around. Everywhere, it was the same nothingness. I began to feel that my learning how to walk was useless.
Until one moment... something new and beautiful arrived at my existence. It was just a tiny speck, in the midst of nothingness, and it hurt my eyes. But I loved it, knew that I had to experience it more! I walked towards it, faster and faster, finding the contentment in the center of my existence grow. It must have been the most exciting moment of my existence then. As I approached it, so it grew, and I continued to walk faster and faster, trying my best to reach it...
And then, unconsciousness claimed me, at the worst possible moment. When I regained my senses, I found that I had been plunged back into nothingness. Despair hit me and for a time, I didn't want to move, didn't want to explore, in case I find that my efforts would just be in vain.
And so was my existence for a very long time...
Until something came to change it. The sounds were different from what I usually encountered. They came in different ways and, somehow, I felt them to have some sort of meaning. I listened, eager with my new discovery.
The sounds became louder, nearer. Better. And then the tiny speck that I had once found, which had once broken nothingness, came nearer. For the first time, I came to learn that the nothingness I had always known hid something beautiful beneath, if only the tiny speck that hurt my eyes would exist nearby. I didn't comprehend what I saw; they were figures that I couldn't make out, but I didn't care. I stood where I was and watched. It was the first time I had ever had something to watch.
One figure came nearer. And then a deafening sound, like thunder. The figure fell, almost swallowed by the darkness, with only his hand holding onto cold stone. I instantly felt a connection to this figure and decided that I have to rescue him from the darkness. I walked to him. As I came nearer, the connection grew; I learned my first vestiges of language. I reached out a hand to him and said, what my heart has been dying to say for a very long time...
"I have been waiting for you."
I pulled him away from the darkness and rested him on the stone.
For the first time, I felt that my existence already had meaning.
(to be continued)
Click here to proceed to Chapter 7. Click here to see the Table of Contents.
Genre: Romance, Angst
Description: Despite his love for Seto Kaiba, the Pharaoh Yami Yugi has decided to move on to the afterlife. Now, he feels regret for his decision, and prays for another chance for him and his beloved to be together.
Pairing: Seto Kaiba x Yami Yugi (Prideshipping)
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh!
Contemplations in the Afterlife
by: scarlet wax petal
Click here to return to Chapter 5. Click here to see the Table of Contents.
Chapter 6: Torment
A long, long time ago, I awoke with my mind a virtual blank. I had no memories, knew nothing -- not even a language, not even an inkling of who I was or what I was. I felt like I had just been born -- only that, unlike a newborn child, I had the capacity to easily receive and keep memories and sensations; that, I was sure of. Thus, my memories began at that moment when I first opened my eyes and became aware of my consciousness.
But... where was I?
All I could see... was nothing. And it was cold, and piercingly silent. Occasionally, I would hear what I later found out to be drops of water, or the whispers of the wind, or the booming drumming thunder. I was always glad whenever I heard those sounds; that was how I became certain that I could hear. Furthermore, they broke the tedious silence, and gave me something to look forward to.
Other than that, there was nothing. Nothing to see, nothing to do.
I would then fall into unconsciousness. For how long, I didn't know. And then I would awaken, to the same nothingness. To the same cold. And then fall into unconsciousness once again. It always felt pleasant whenever I fell into unconsciousness because, then, I wouldn't be feeling anything. It was wonderful not to feel anything.
I hated the boredom. I hated not having anything to do.
I hated it whenever I woke up. Whenever I realized I had awakened, I would try my best to slip into the wonderful oblivion again. To no avail. I would have to wait for it to arrive, and it always took so long. Months? Years? Decades? I didn't know. I never wanted to know. It was tormenting. The silence was tearing me apart. The darkness was driving me to the brink of losing control. The cold was piercing through the center of my existence. I wished that I would just lose control. Or, better yet, cease to exist. But it never happened.
Finally, I decided I was tired of not having anything to do. Somehow, I knew I had to do something! I began to explore the capabilities of my consciousness. Somehow, I learned that I had to capacity to move. Why had it taken me so long to learn this? But I didn't mind; I was overjoyed to learn that I had that ability. Now I had something to do!
Bit by bit, I moved around. At first, it was exhausting, dragging myself through what I later learned to be the floor. But I was glad to feel the sensation of being exhausted. It was a new feeling. Most of all, I was glad to find myself moving. Then, I began to ease myself upward, away from the floor. I made use of what I later found out to be legs. At first, I fell back to the floor. But I was determined. I would ease myself upward, then fall, then ease myself upward again. Until I learned to stand on my own. And, later on, walk on my own.
I walked around. Everywhere, it was the same nothingness. I began to feel that my learning how to walk was useless.
Until one moment... something new and beautiful arrived at my existence. It was just a tiny speck, in the midst of nothingness, and it hurt my eyes. But I loved it, knew that I had to experience it more! I walked towards it, faster and faster, finding the contentment in the center of my existence grow. It must have been the most exciting moment of my existence then. As I approached it, so it grew, and I continued to walk faster and faster, trying my best to reach it...
And then, unconsciousness claimed me, at the worst possible moment. When I regained my senses, I found that I had been plunged back into nothingness. Despair hit me and for a time, I didn't want to move, didn't want to explore, in case I find that my efforts would just be in vain.
And so was my existence for a very long time...
Until something came to change it. The sounds were different from what I usually encountered. They came in different ways and, somehow, I felt them to have some sort of meaning. I listened, eager with my new discovery.
The sounds became louder, nearer. Better. And then the tiny speck that I had once found, which had once broken nothingness, came nearer. For the first time, I came to learn that the nothingness I had always known hid something beautiful beneath, if only the tiny speck that hurt my eyes would exist nearby. I didn't comprehend what I saw; they were figures that I couldn't make out, but I didn't care. I stood where I was and watched. It was the first time I had ever had something to watch.
One figure came nearer. And then a deafening sound, like thunder. The figure fell, almost swallowed by the darkness, with only his hand holding onto cold stone. I instantly felt a connection to this figure and decided that I have to rescue him from the darkness. I walked to him. As I came nearer, the connection grew; I learned my first vestiges of language. I reached out a hand to him and said, what my heart has been dying to say for a very long time...
"I have been waiting for you."
I pulled him away from the darkness and rested him on the stone.
For the first time, I felt that my existence already had meaning.
(to be continued)
Click here to proceed to Chapter 7. Click here to see the Table of Contents.
posted by cent @ 11:54 AM
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